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CHAPTER ONE - WHAT IS REAL LOVE?
We are designed to know
Him in the power of His resurrection.
(Phil. 3:10)
What I am calling Real Love is indeed Resurrection
Love. It is one with, and a part of Resurrection Life. It can be experienced
and obtained only during and after the death of what was there before. So first of all we need to determine that
what we have now is not enough or not the real thing. Furthermore, whatever it is that we have determined
is not enough or not the real thing, now needs to be replaced by something
greater. That something greater must be
that which we can have, use, and be in all of our everyday relationships and
activities, with all people, in their godly role, function, and order. That
something greater must be able to fulfill what is required of Real Love.
We wouldn't be looking for the real thing if what we already have is doing the job
right now. We tried to make it work with
what we already have and what we already know, and it simply is not
enough. It is not good enough, not
powerful enough, and it doesn't satisfy.
I hear the frustration and the concern of those who come for
help in counsel. The next twenty bullet
points are commonly heard complaints, even among born-again, Spirit-filled
believers:
- I
don't get it. I want to love, but I
don't seem to have what it takes.
- I
don't understand what God can be expecting from me.
- I give
my very best and I know inside that I don't have what it takes to really
love according to scripture in this situation.
- I know
I used to be able to love, but now it doesn't seem to work for who I am
anymore.
- I
don't feel it. I feel like I'm just
pretending.
- I
don't have the joy.
- It
doesn't get me through and over the hurdles of all the abuse and rejection
I face in the relationships and situations that I have had to experience
in my life.
- I've
been betrayed! I've been
wounded! I've been cheated on and
lied to! I have been deceived! How can I love in my situation?
- The
love I have is not sufficient to cover any multitude of sins, to love
unconditionally, to turn the other cheek, to love the unlovely, or to
forgive 70 times 7.
- I feel
like a fake and a failure. I don't
even know if I really love myself.
- What
I've been experiencing that is supposed to be love doesn't meet any of my
own needs for love and I feel like I'm trying to give out of an empty
vessel.
- I
don't know how to receive it and I don't have what it takes to give real
love to anyone else.
- What I
have is simply not enough to do all that I need LOVE to do and to be in my
life.
- If
there is anything better than this, I need to understand what it is, how
to get it, and how to make it real and not merely dead works. I have been trying to ‘love' by being
under the law, instead of having the law written on my heart and doing it
by heart.
- I'm
stuck.
- I
don't have anything else to give.
- I'm at
the end of myself.
- I've
pulled myself up by the bootstraps for the last time.
- I've
tried to love, but it just doesn't seem to work.
- I've
given and given of myself, but I just don't seem to have anything else to
give.
I need the
Real Thing! I need Real Love for myself and I need enough Real Love to overflow
in abundance to all those around me!
The problem is that we want to love with this kind of love out
of our own selves rather than to understand that our own selves are
incapable of this kind of supernatural stuff.
We need to learn how to displace the old self-effort by reckoning the
old man dead. Each of us must know,
reckon, and believe in his heart that his "old man" was crucified with
Jesus Christ at Calvary. That would be retroactive to
2000 years ago. We must experience the
yielding over of the heart and life and temple that we are to the Lordship of
The Divine Nature of God. The only way
we can do this is by faith. Then
God will take over our vessel and fill us with the Real Love that He is, and then
it is "No longer I, but Christ" living in me and as me. (Gal. 2:20) Then it is Him and His love that is
loving others from within me, and through me, and instead of me (therefore this
love will be for all the right motives). The only way that this can or will
happen is by getting this understanding and learning to yield (see the
chapter on the power of yielding) to Christ in me, the only hope of Glory.
(Col. 1:27)
We need understanding, and when we hear the truth, we will
recognize it and believe it. We need to
come to believe that this is a real thing and it is available to us and for
us. We need to know who and what it is
we are yielding to in order to let the Mind of Christ and His Spirit and Nature
function in us and through us. This book
is written to bring understanding that will assist cooperation with the work of
the Divine Nature of God to fill us, overtake us, and flow out from us as
rivers of living water. His Presence
will be more than enough to meet all the needs we have for love.
Real Love is the tangible manifestation of "No longer I, but
Christ who lives in me." (Gal. 2:20) The
very presence of Real Love must and will identify and expose the old carnal,
adamic nature and lead it to, in, and through the cross experience; and that
which remains that is of the design of God will be raised up unto resurrection
life. I know that nothing good lives in
me, that is, in my sinful nature. (Rom. 7:18) NIV
You see this great presence of God that is Real Love is not
a fluffy, lightweight, pleasurable thing as we first begin to face it. Real Love in the form of Christ in you comes
to bring a sword, to divide, and to bring the refiner's fire. It comes to take over all that was committed
to it. This magnificent and powerful
great Love will braid the whip and use it to discern, identify, expose, drive
out, destroy, crucify, and kill all that does not belong there in His
Father's House, in His temple, in His rightful place. This is the perfect Love of God that is here
to take the kingdom by force, for He is righteous. He is here to move the giants off the land
that has been promised and given to Him.
This love wars, kills, delivers, and redeems. This Love purges, purifies, prunes, and
restores. It will destroy all that is in
you and me, which is not of Christ. It
will expose all that is antichrist, against, or instead of Perfect and Real
Love, for God is Love.
A perfect type and
shadow for us, and a perfect picture of the truth about us as the temple of
God, a house and a vehicle and a container that needs to be purged and
delivered of what's there, and filled and overtaken by the Lord is shown in
scripture:
Now, brethren, concerning the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ and our
gathering together to Him, we ask you, not to be soon shaken in mind or
troubled, either by spirit or by word or by letter, as if from us, as though
the day of Christ had come. Let no one
deceive you by any means; for that Day will not come unless the falling away
comes first, and the man of sin is revealed, the son of perdition, who opposes
and exalts himself above all that is called God or that is worshiped, so that
he sits as God in the temple of God, showing himself that he is God. Do you not
remember that when I was still with you I told you these things? And now you
know what is restraining, that he may be revealed in his own time. For the mystery of lawlessness is already at
work; only He who now restrains will do so until He is taken out of the
way. And then the lawless one will be
revealed, whom the Lord will consume with the breath of His mouth and destroy
with the brightness of His coming. (2 Thess. 2:1-8) NKJ
Even here, the abomination of desolation in this form that
is found sitting in the temple of God,
exalting itself, and resisting and opposing everything that is God... even this
one is destroyed by the brightness of the appearing of the presence and nature
of God in His own temple (which we are).
The brightness of the appearing of Real Love in you and in me will
destroy all that has been residing in us and identified as us that is not God,
or the Son of God, Christ in you, the Hope of Glory. (Col. 1:27)
As it was on the third day with the wine at the wedding
feast at Cana, the first taste we're given is a taste of
the inferior (John 2:1-11). It was also
temporary. It ended. It ran out.
It got all used up and it was no more.
The first impartation of love we get is natural. It is a mixture of phileao and eros (human love). It is sensual, selfish, and immature. It is great at taking and lame at
giving. It is as the love of a child,
which is immature. Real love is about
putting away the things of a child. It
is superficial, lacking depth and quality.
It is of the temporary and unsatisfying natural kind of love, or wine as
the case was at Cana.
It is all there is, okay and desirable, until the Perfect comes. But
when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done
away. (1 Cor. 13:10) NKJ The
first did not last and it did not compare to what The Lord had to offer; it was
disappointing and was considered inferior.
And he said to him, "Every man at the beginning sets out the good
wine, and when the guests have well drunk, then the inferior. You have kept the good wine until now!" (John
2:10) NKJ
We also are invited to a wedding feast. We are called to participate in the most
intimate form. We are in Christ, the
Bridegroom, and we are also His Precious Church, His Bride. We are called into the communion of the
Wedding Supper. We are to experience
from both sides now, His Real Love.
We thought (like the first wine that was served) that the
first taste we had of love was the real thing (because it was all we
knew of love up to that point). We assumed it was the best there was
available. We thought it was because
naturally at weddings (love celebrations) they serve the best first and save
the other for after. However, the ways
of God are different (higher) than our ways.
When all of the first wine that was available was entirely
gone, and all that was left was nothing but 6 stone vessels filled with water
(6 is the number of man), only then
was it possible and the right time for the miraculous to happen. It is only after the absolute end and death
of the natural that the supernatural can appear on the scene and be
manifested. That's what makes it
supernatural. And because it was
produced from the insufficiency of the natural in the first place, it takes
nothing but God on the scene to keep it coming.
The miraculous provision, healing, and the multiplication of God comes
forth out of a little boy's lunch, empty vessels for oil, stone water pots, a
rock, spit mixed with mud, a seed, a staff, a promise, a word, etc.
The supernatural is most excellent and is the permanent
reality. That which is raised from the
dead is lasting, permanent, and eternal.
To get to the resurrection stuff, there is a death required of the old
and the first. When it is about a change
of nature, whatever is temporary and natural in us must come to an end to make
room for the eternal and supernatural divine nature of God to be glorified in
His temple (which we are). For the
death that He died, He died to sin once for all; but the life that He lives, He
lives to God. (Rom. 6:10)
NKJ If we are one with Him in
His death we will also be one with Him in His life.
You will find "Real Love" far beyond the boundaries of the
romantic, mushy, sweet stuff that feels so good. The Real Love is proven gold tried in the fire. Find it and buy it with your life. Find it realms above the superficial words,
rituals, and appearances that are, indeed, wonderful gestures (and yet though
genuine may also be only skin deep). All
that glitters is not gold. All these
things are important and wonderful (like lace and frosting), but in their most perfect form, they
are merely overflow when you have the "Real Thing."
What is the "Real Thing?"
It is something far greater and more excellent that comes from deep
within, from underneath, and from above...from the nature of God; but most
importantly, from the nature of God IN YOU. The day will come that you find out for
yourself that this "Real Love" I'm talking about is not merely a desirable
option, but an absolute necessity. It is
the manifested presence of God and our ability
(by empowerment) to contain and express His very substance.
You
are designed to need it, you'll die to have it, and it will be
tested.
We can always work up some sugary, generic, empty calorie
juice that looks like love from the soul realm; but the human stuff is not
enough to pass the full test of "Real Love" when the testing comes; and the
testing does and will come. Being "nice"
is not enough. Romance is valuable and
precious, but many relationships and many marriages die because they've come to
a time and place where "Real Love" was required to be proven; and they found
they were bankrupt, and were not willing to do what it takes to acquire
some. "Let this mind
be in you which was also in Christ Jesus." (Phil 2:5) Move
out of the way and let Christ be your life.
You know what He will do; let Him do it in you and through you.
We all want to be on the receiving end of this
unconditional, supernatural stuff; and it's rare to find. It will change the
world and has the power to catapult you into heaven, but it can't be proven
under ideal conditions, or when things are running smoothly. So don't think something's wrong just because
something is wrong. IN CONTEXT:
For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory
which shall be revealed in us. For the
earnest expectation of the creature waiteth for the manifestation of the sons
of God. For the creature was made
subject to vanity, not willingly, but by reason of Him who hath subjected the
same in hope; because the creature itself also shall be delivered from the
bondage of corruption into the glorious liberty of the children of God. (ROM
8:18-21) KJV
When it appears that something is wrong, it is our opportunity to be overcomers. You cannot be an overcomer unless you have
something to overcome. Real Love
overcomes, never fails, and endures all things.
Even the heathen can love when all the conditions are wonderful, but
when "for better or worse" ends up "far
worse," and when push comes to shove, and when the pressure and stress on you
is insurmountable, and when the one you thought was lovely becomes extremely
unlovely, you will need to dig deeper into the recesses of your heart. When you find that the last stash of your own
human love has run out, and you realize you must have already spent your entire
storehouse of forgiveness, it may feel
like the end, but it's only the beginning of "Real Love." Like at the wedding feast, when all the wine
ran out, impartation that proved when they thought it was all gone and looked
to The Lord, it was the opportunity and the beginning of tasting the best which
was saved for last. (John 2:2-10)
A time will come in your
relationships, when your
natural way of doing things no longer works.
You will need to get a hold of something more powerful than what you now
have. You will either learn to tap into God's
commodities that are supernatural, or stay stuck with stunted growth. You must know when this time comes; it's your
turn for the real contents of your heart to be proven. As you mature spiritually you will need to
learn how to reach up into a higher realm to get a hold of some of that unconditional
love that covers a
multitude of sin, and some of that red
forgiveness that was shed to pay for the sins of all the world. You will need to learn to handle these
commodities for yourself and for others if you are called to be a son of
God. The commodities are of His very substance. What a privilege and responsibility we have
received; to stand as priests, able to minister both to God Almighty, and to his people.
Unconditional love
is real love. It has no criteria. You don't earn it, can't lose it, and it's
not based on being deserving or worthy.
It's not based on measuring up.
It's not contingent on the condition, performance, or behavior of the
recipient, but on the immeasurable wealth and richness of the benefactor. It's not about the recipient; it's all about
the giver. When I let the one who is the substance and source of this real, unconditional
love, live in me and flood and flush this love through me and out to every
human being, I become purified, transformed, and illuminated. I become fulfilled.
When I am full of
this real love that is
unconditional, I am afraid of nothing. I
am not concerned about what could hurt me, but instead I am full of this
perfect love that flushes out and casts out all fear.
Fear is full of torment that is concerned about myself; but when I let this perfect love abide in me, I am concerned only about getting
some of this overflowing, abundant, rich and good stuff to all people so they
can all be as He is in this world (1 Jn 4:17).
It is too good to keep for myself.
I want everyone to know it, to have it, to be healed and transformed by
it. I can be so full of His love to give
that I am almost in pain looking for a place to release it, to give it. There is no room for fear and no hollow place
for selfishness to hide. This real love longs to give, to heal, to serve, and
to help. This love is so rich, that it
has need of nothing but a recipient! It
aches and desires to relieve suffering.
Can you sense the
heady high, the euphoria, the heavenly anointing as you imagine yourself full
of this nature, of this substance? Can
you see how this living, loving nature of God will deliver captives from all
addictions and heal the brokenhearted?
The poor become rich and the blind are able to see!!! Can you see?
Are you rich? The whole world is
dying for this manifestation of
the nature of God, of the sons of God!
This manifestation is not religious but a transforming power that
raptures souls, meeting needs. And if
you are a cell and member of the body of Christ alive on the face of this earth
today, you must have an ear to hear. He
will appear in His body and the whole world will know that we are Christians by
our love (by His love, by this real love). They'll know the difference,
do you?
Love and forgiveness are the spiritual moisturizers
that cover and protect the heart and keep it supple, soft, and sweet. We were given only a
foretaste in the first place in order to know what we were missing once
it was gone.
We begin to not like our selves as we hit the bottom of
our human love and go
dry. In the place where the sweet nectar
of God, and the buttery softness and sweetness of innocence runs out, we
develop a rusty corrosion of fragmented scales. We produce a hard covering that
attempts to do the job of protecting the heart without or instead of
forgiveness and love. The covering is called hardness
of heart and bitterness.
They are the combined toxic work of the enemy to make provision for the
covering of the heart apart from the nature of God.
Things can get
rough; that soft heart is vulnerable.
How quickly a soft heart can toughen up.
How difficult to soften it again.
We can eat away at ourselves and each other and act out of the carnal
nature until we absolutely cannot stand it anymore. Pressure will cause us to find out who we
really are. We may find when we are
measured that we come up lacking. "You
have been weighed in the balances, and found wanting." (Dan 5:27) We may reach for an addiction to anesthetize the pain and try to fill
the void, or we may be ready to be filled with that second, and best batch of
wine, prepared for the wedding feast by The Divine Nature. Addictions are a waste of time except to
expose, identify, and eventually eliminate all of your idols and cheap
substitutes; and to let your rebellion run itself out, bringing you to the end
of yourself. Addictions will all prove
themselves to be false gods, whose goal is to steal, kill, and destroy you.
I tell you this: Nothing will fill that void but the pure
and powerful, unconditional love and forgiveness of God. It is His very substance, life, and
nature. You need it for yourself, to
fill you and to live in you, as you, and instead of you. Imagine this in you without mixture. You need it to flow out of you to every human
being. Nothing short of a death to self
will make room for this magnificent nature to become your life, fill your
place, your name, your space.
Freshly now, by
faith, invite, accept, and receive all that He is, and begin to bring every
thought into obedience, dwelling upon His goodness (which leads to repentance). Abide in Him and let His word abide in
you. You no longer run on automatic, unconsciously,
but begin to fight to stay conscious in the Spirit, and to choose life, one
moment at a time. You choose now to live
out of only what and who He is...
giving out of His account, His work, His abundance. To do this you must know Him.
You must know what He will do and say.
You must know His nature. You
must study Him and visualize and imagine all that He is living out of you. Imagine how He would respond to your problems
and people. Meditate on it, but not to
long. Get the picture, then let the
Christ in You answer and respond to whatever your situation is in the present
second. Put all those concurring present
seconds together in the same way and you have successfully yielded to the
nature of God living out of you. You are
one with Him and He is one with you.
Your first quest
is to know Him more and know Him better and then you will know more precisely what and who you are yielding
to. Know His nature and know His
word. He says, "Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me; for I
am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."
(Matt 11:29‑30) KJ
His spirit is
distinctly kind, patient, generous, and sweet.
The Divine Nature is a refreshing surprise to bump into in daily
interactions. It catches people off
guard. They are not expecting that patient, loving response. They expect human nature, dog eat dog; not
the divine nature to show up in you!
Even the smallest kindness can be the highlight of anothers day.
They glance deep in your eyes to see who it is that would have this
nature. Do they see Him in you? Or is His presence in you a secret? The world expects us to be out
to get and are
stunned and bewildered when we prove we are out to give and help freely. They know that it's Jesus. They think you're an angel because so few
people are able to love freely, or have time to help, or are quick to forgive.
Your life is not
your own. It was bought with a price,
and given to you only for you to realize you can't do anything with it apart
from God. And so you bring it back to Him,
and yield it over to Him in the only increments you have: each present second as it is here, and each
area and matter as they come up for the testing. You give your life back to Him by letting Him
have His way in you. You yield your
members over to Him. You refuse to allow
any other nature to function in you or through you. You submit yourself to God and resist the
devil and he must flee from you. Human
beings are vessels that contain power.
We are not powers in ourselves.
We have the power to yield the vessel which we are over to good or evil,
life or death, love or fear, intimacy or strife, darkness or light.
Who will live in
you? Whose nature will speak? Who will respond to the offense, to the
insult, to the rejection? Will it be
that old nasty nature? Or will you yield
over the mind and the heart and the mouth for the only Nature that is worthy to
live in any of us: the nature of
LOVE. Yield to Him and surprise, bless,
and astound your neighbor, your perpetrator, or your spouse with Divine Love: Compassion, Mercy, and Wisdom.
Restrain and resist that old selfish way you have had of doing things,
and refuse to excuse yourself any longer. Refuse to justify and rationalize that old
behavior and way of thinking. Refuse to
procrastinate. THE PRESENT SECOND,
before it passes, is the only time and place there is any power for you to
change. Now is the time. Beware, brethren, lest there be in any of
you an evil heart of unbelief in departing from the living God; but exhort one
another daily, while it is called "Today," lest any of you be hardened through
the deceitfulness of sin. For we have
become partakers of Christ if we hold the beginning of our confidence steadfast
to the end, while it is said: "Today, if you will hear His voice, do not harden
your hearts as in the rebellion." (Heb 3:12-15) NKJ
What does the word
of God and his unconditional love and forgiveness say about the matters you are
now dealing with? Do you need to waste
any more time? Get the picture of what
it would look like, sound like, and feel like to yield to Him, and then do
it. Do it now. Walk it out, speak it out, give it out, and
let that old nature be starved out. You
feel vulnerable and you may feel like your dying. It's the Gethsemane Garden experience when you first fight and win
the decision to let LOVE have His perfect way in you and through you. You fight and win again and again, until it
is settled in the heavens, and the pit stops bringing it up, and you are proven
as an overcomer. You know who you are,
you eat and enjoy the fruit of love, and you know the value of the ground you
have taken.
It's now or later.
We must through much tribulations
enter the kingdom of God. (Acts 14:22) NKJ Get on with it. It hurts for but a moment, and only to make
way for that which is our great satisfaction. For we will find ourselves suddenly on the
resurrection side of the cross; which is the fulfillment, the glory, and the
reward. Looking unto Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, who for
the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and
has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. (Hebrews 12:2) NKJ That's a clue as to the value of where to
keep your focus. See the cross, but look
on through it, to focus on the other side.
Within moments of yielding wholeheartedly to THE RIGHT-EOUS SPIRIT and
THE RIGHT-EOUS NATURE... while doing and saying what needs to be said and done (His
thoughts, His words, His actions), we can move from death to life and taste the
fruit of resurrection that fast! We can
lay a fatal blow to the walls of stubbornness, fear, and pride that deceived us
and blocked us from this fulfillment in life by simply YIELDING.
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